if you always get up late, you'll never be on time..

This is how i feel about life right now.

Ive decided that its time to start making moves, even if they are little moves, its time to make moves. Say those things i dont usually say, spend the extra 4 minutes writing a review that i thought of on the couch, read about that band, listen to the song and judge it. I know this may sound confusing, but its not that crazy. I am trying to be proactive about life. If i do things, things will happen. If i sit idly by, nothing will ever happen for me. No love, no work, no passion. Nothing. I need to put the energy out there and hope that it will come back one day. I dont know why i choose to start writing reviews, i dont even think they are that good, but its just something im trying. I think my opinion counts on some level, and even though nobody is reading it, maybe one day they will and they will be into it! or maybe it will lead me to something new i never thought about, or maybe ill meet someone who wants me to write for them, because they like my style. i dont know. but i will never ever know if i dont try at least right? i want to write a blog everyday or at least try to, even if its a few sentences on nonsense, it is putting energy out there..

on a lighter note, i decided to try to make myself go to the gym at least 5 days a week until i go to san fran, and also to eat super healthy and have no snacks, and no burgers, or anything. just be super healthy and work out and see what happens. i want to feel my best and have the most confidence in myself when i go down there. im going to see a lot of people i havent seen in a long time, and also people who when they last saw me i was at one of my worse moments in life. i was a wasted crying mess, i dont even know what i said or did, i just know it was embarrassing, and i want to feel my best when i see them again. i dont know whats gonna happen with rm, but i hope he doesnt get all weird, and freak out about this. i really just want to hang out. i want to be with my friend, and play games and smoke weed and just chill. i hope it happens.